Carlos:Hi Julio.

Julio:Oh, hi Carlito! (moves in for a kiss)
(they kiss on the cheek)

Carlos:How's the kissing thing going then

Julio:Oh, so so.

Carlos:How many knife fights is it now?

Julio:I stopped counting.

Carlos:What else are you up to these days?

Julio:Well I had a great idea.

Carlos:(mutters)Oh hell!

Julio:What?

Carlos:I said, oh well, let's hear it then?

Julio:Well. You like pork don't you?

Carlos:Mmmmm sweet sweet pork

Julio:Good. But what happens after you've killed your pig?

Carlos:I dunno, I suppose the butcher gets paid.

Julio:Damn Bourgeoise.... no, I mean what happens to the rest of the animal after you've had your chops and your bacon.

Carlos:There's a rest of the animal?

Julio:Yeah, you know, feet, stomach.... bits and pieces....

Carlos:So... we already know what goes into chorizos

Julio:Yes but the other bits... the bits that don't make it into sausages.

Carlos:I don't know but I reckon you're going to tell me...

Julio:We make Locro

Carlos:You're loco.

Julio:No, Locro... I saw some of the Indians making something with llamas up in the North... I reckon we can use the bits of pig... we'll make a killing...

Carlos:Someone will, at any rate... so... what's so special

Julio:It's a corn and bean stew... but we put in all of the trotters, toenails, rubbery bits, anything that you can't foist on the chorizo makers... and you sell it...

Carlos:No one will eat it... it's not physically possible to chew bone...
Julio:That's the beauty of it... we can make it a national dish, that way everyone will want to eat it, we can make it a tradition to eat it on... say... May 25th, I can see it now, all over the country people will have pans of pig bits boiling in beans and they'll do it in the name of national pride...

Carlos:I can see it too... you're going to be strung up by your own bits... Haven't you had enough knife fights for one lifetime.

Julio:Aww come on... be fair... why not come and have lunch...


Note: Locro is actually really really nice, but it does contain trotters and tripo gordo (large intestine) and knuckles and all sorts of inedibles that give it flavour but you don't eat... well you suck the rubbery flesh from them and suck down all the porcine goodness you can... at least I do anyway... and tomorrow, the 9th, is another traditional day for eating locro, it being independence day and all...
  ¶ 11:56 PM